Monday, June 8, 2009

Today = Fail

Fail 1 :
Woke up at 7 and fell back asleep until 8.

Fail 2 :
Quest Diagnostics tells me that my blood work must be completed between the hours of 6 and 9 am. it was 10:15 when I arrived. No, Dr. P. did not tell me this. Surprise, surprise.
Quest does not have the other tests that I need to take - home tests.

Fail 3:
Trying to be super productive, I begin packing up our junk. I pick up the box and the bottom falls out. I get to repack the drawers as I cannot find anything but scotch tape - which ironically I found on the floor thanks to my p.o.s. box.

Fail 4 :
Phone call to second Quest consists of...
me: "Hi, I was calling to see if you had any salivary cortisol tests."
woman: "cortical tests?"
me: "No, salivary cortisol tests."
woman: "Thyroid tests?"
me: "No SALIVARY CORTISOL Tests."
woman: "What tests? thyroid cortisol tests?"
me: "No, salivary like saliva."
woman: "Eye? pink eye?"
me: "SALIVA, like spit you know? salivary cortisol tests."
woman: "OH thyroid cortisol tests?!"
me: "NO SALIVARY, LIKE SALIVA, CORTISOL TESTS."
woman: "OHHH, ok salivary cortisol tests?"
me: "YES!!!- sigh of relief"
woman: "Don't you just spit in a bucket for that?"
me: "I don't know, I'm guessing not just any bucket. That's why I'm calling."
woman: "Ok, we have them."
me: "Ok thank you, where are you located?"
woman: "On B.B. Downs. near the bus bench"
me: "The bus bench???? Which bus bench?"
woman: "On the corner of Holly and B.B. Downs."
me: "Ok, thank you" -Hang up- "Holy shit, that was intense"

Fail 5:
Drove all the way to Payless to discover that they have ugly shoes.


and it's only 5 o'clock.
lol

Hope your day was more successful than mine,
K.

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